Sober Alcoholics: The Voices

I used to enjoy being on my own.
Now, the silence is getting too loud.
A pin drop terrifies me.
There’s a storm coming, but I can’t convince anyone of that fact.

I am calm on the surface, but beneath I’m paddling my life away.
My knees are getting weaker each day, but I have to show strength and always take a stand.
I’m exhausted, they told me that winners don’t quit.
And I want to win, but I feel this type of win comes at a huge cost.

I am the cost, something tells me.
And every day I’m trying to avoid those voices.
But every time its quiet, they come back.
So I keep busy and try to always be the life of the party.

Photo by Suparerg Suksai on

The cost is me, that’s what I always hear.
I’m scared that I hear these things alone.
And sometimes I only realise I’ve been crying when I hear my tears drop on the floor.
The tornado in my head is so loud that I lose sight of what is happening at present.

These are some of the things I need to work on.
I wish I could not feel as alone as most times.
I wish we were a tribe, so we could have each other’s backs.
For I know, “we” is always better that “I”.


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