Sober Alcoholics: (Prayers)

I’m not a religious person.
No, I actually am a religious person.
I wouldn’t be thinking of prayer if I wasn’t.
Maybe I think I’m not because it’s been a while since I did it.

Maybe I don’t know what to pray for.
It gets difficult to admit there’s a need to,
Especially when asked which one is a priority and you’re not sure.
And the other thing, you look at others and it sounds like they’re praying for the same thing. Now you get confused because you don’t know if prayer is a fashion and whether you must follow the trend.

I’m not that strong, I just refuse to always appear as a victim.
Even when it’s not my fault I try to take some responsibility and understand that I played a part.
Because of that, sometimes how I appear is not always how I feel.
I’ve always felt someone with empathy can understand better than someone who thinks I want pity. So I choose to empathize with myself instead.

Sometimes that approach makes me forget that I too need an outlet.
It’s even sadder that I forget there’s divine intervention.
If I believe I didn’t get here by myself, then I should not forget to offload my joys and burdens to the one who helped me to get here.
Thinking I’m always the expert advice that I need can become a drug and consuming. Therefore I too also need guidance from a more powerful being than I am.

To keep me sane

Until now, all I’ve been doing is explaining why I don’t pray anymore. So let’s get to it.

Let us pray…
… For each other.


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